Hansel and Gretel Get Baked (2012)

Hello, my horror babies! This is a special review for my special people (you know who you are) who like a little something extra when they chill. With the influx of Hansel and Gretel movies (Why? Who knows? Who cares, ha!), there have been some very special versions made. I missed seeing Jeremy Renner in theatres, so when I came across Hansel and Gretel Get Baked, I decided to take a chance and spend some time watching.

First off, this is one of those horror movies not to be taken seriously. Hello, it’s called Hansel and Gretel Get Baked……we all know what’s going on. But in fairness, it was rather enjoyable to watch. Gretel is the more lazy of the siblings, she rather chill with her boyfriend, Ashton, than do something productive like her more straight-laced brother, Hansel. Hansel finds his lovely sister and her man hanging out in her room, enjoying a new strain of the herbal variety. When they run out, Ash makes a run for more at the seller’s house, a sweet little old lady who introduced the new herb. When Ash doesn’t come back, Gretel is definitely worried. She seems to be the only one, though. Even Ash’s friends can’t be bothered with his disappearance. Gretel visits the old woman, but is given the run around. What happens afterwards is a comedy horror movie of greed, some blood, a seriously huge “herb” garden and a lot of Lara Flynn Boyle’s face getting a bit younger.

Yes, Lara Flynn Boyle….you read right. I, for one, believe she was the perfect actress to play a crazy youth-stealing witch with Nazi paraphernalia in her gingerbread house. Not that any of that was explained, but with all the craziness going on in the movie, you don’t mind in the long run. You root for Gretel (Molly C. Quinn), Hansel (Michael Welch), even for the greedy pushers to come out on top (I personally hoped that Carlos, played by Reynaldo Gallegos, would have come out only slightly harmed….hey, I have to have my eye candy). All in all, Get Baked is one of those movies when you’re in the mood for a little blood, a little herb, and a lot of laughs. Enjoy, babies.

Scream factor:………You’re kidding, right? Go watch it! LOL


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